I really inspire myself sometimes! A couple of days ago, I was lamenting the change in season, feeling shut out of one of my favorite places-the outdoors-and wondering what in the world a boy like me could do to entertain himself. So I referred back to my blog entrees from a year ago in search of ideas for fun and exciting activities. What I found and what I read were a "Titillating Essay" and a blog in which I shared my astonishment over what individuals and society are capable of. Neither entry described what it was I was up to that late November, 2005. Rather, both were mini-essays based upon some thinking on the "science of happiness", the impetus for thoughts, and the astonishment of human behavior-all really interesting topics, I felt. Reading those blog entrees reminded me that writing can be very fun and very rewarding. I felt better because I re-realized that there's something else I enjoy doing that doesn't require sunlight and 60 degree+ temps. Yeah, its definately more of a challenge keeping oneself entertained in the winter, but there's plenty I look forward to doing these days-and writing more is certainly high on the list.

So what have I been up to these days? What's been on my mind?
For the record, after the Austin trip, I was somewhat sick and rather miserable for a couple of weeks. This coincided with a bout of mild depression, which wasn't unusual considering my ill health and the time of year. Oddly enough, I tweaked a muscle in my neck just as my sore throat and fatigue started to abate. For another week, I existed in a state of relative physical discomfort. All in all, things could have been better in November.

Since Austin, I've let a lot of good times pass by without writing about them here. I feel really bad about that. Like a week ago, Fern and I met up with Elizabeth, Edvin, and Laura at the Balcony for some chatting and dancing. For the few songs that were worth dancing to, I felt very much in the groove, so to speak. It was fun. Saturday, Fern and I went snowboarding for the first time this winter. We stayed at Bogus for around four hours; during which time I sucked and was in a bad mood, but quickly found (yes) a groove and thoroughly enjoyed myself until the end. I also discovered the joy of synchronized snowboarding that afternoon.

Fern and I have declared November and December (possibly January on) extra thrifty months for us so that we might succeed in paying down large chunks of credit card balances and begin saving for our next vacation (Europe/Spain anyone?). I'm due to pay off one credit card mid month-yeehaw! As such, we have taken in several dollar movies in the last month or so.

I'd love to keep writing, but I've got a few loads of laundry to get to, and sleep has been a priority lately (I dunno, that time of year)... Speaking of priorities, I've concluded that now is the time to sort through my priorities again and refocus my efforts to act-to accomplish a thing or two. Quickly then:

Priority numero uno hasn't changed for a long time. It is-
1) Enjoy myself-do what makes me happy. What little wisdom I've garnered from previous generations by and large can be summed up in this simple creed: Enjoy life, because it doesn't last forever, and as far as we know we only have one. You know, carpe diem. The only "success" that matters is the kind that brings greater happiness, love, contentment, pleasure, and enjoyment to me and those I care about. That's why I can be rather indecisive about what I devote my time to. How much happier would I be if I became a great artist, performer, or philosopher? I don't doubt I could excel in these areas if I chose to spend all of my time honing the necessary skills, and I don't doubt that I could be much happier doing so; however, being certain of the outcome in all cases is nearly impossible. And I can have a bad attitude when I think of our culture's tendency to rely on outward success for momentary highs and self esteem. This tendency is more likely to be the cause of constant dissapointment or low self-esteem, if the habit is allowed to flourish. At anyrate, I intend on being proactive in these areas, but only if my enjoyment is not seriously compromised.

Priority #2 is my health--kinda need to get out of bed in the morning and not worry about impending doom in order to enjoy myself.

Priority #3 are my intellectual hobbies: Trying to strip religion of its monopoly on morality-to get to the heart of ideological division and conflict--to be a peace maker of sorts--so sort out what it means to be human--to advance the science of happiness...

Priority #4: write music--I need to tap into my own emotion and put out, instead of always receiving from outside sources. I want to grow emotionally, and I think writing music is probably a great way to do so. And I'd love to contribute something to the popular music world that's not formulaic in any way--that combines the emotion/sincerity of pop/indie music, with the structure and complexity of classical music(oh wait, isn't that a fomula!).

Priority #5: produce visual art--at the moment, I'm most interested in making erotic images that are extraordinarily tasteful and beautiful. It's a major challenge I know, but one I look forward to tackling. I'd love to see the day when paintings in offices or homes frequently featured images of penises, vaginas, and explicit sex. Seriously! The human body is beautiful. The sooner that is recognized and drilled into our heads, the sooner our society will get over so many of its sexual set-backs and perversions.